Prove It!

I'm not the kind of friend who gives good advices. I'm not good in doing so. I'm not good in giving words of sympathy, either. I just give my friends hug and pat whenever I feel they need one.

Earlier this morning as I woke up, I sent one of my good college friends a 'good morning' SMS, which I had not done to her in few months now. After sending her my message, I went downstairs to have my breakfast. After an hour, I went back to my room to check my messages. Gigie, my friend whom I greeted a good morning message thru SMS, has replied, just right after I sent my greetings. She asked me how I was. Then, I replied. Then she sent me an SMS once again, but this time, her mood changed. In her first message, she seemed happy to have an SMS from me. Her message was with a lot of smileys. But, on her second message, she was complaining about something.

Few minutes before my delayed reply, her family from their province called Gigie and told her that something happened to her older brother, and that Gigie and her other siblings that is outside their hometown must get there, ASAP. Their brother was rushed to the hospital and his condition was not good, she told me, as she complains why it had to happen to them. She seemed losing hope, and I didn't know how to uplift her spirit. I couldn't say anything, but "just keep holding on, and keep the faith". I don't know if that helped. I wanted to be at her side to hug her, but she's too far from where I live.

Earlier this evening, I checked up on her and her brother through fone. She sounded cool, I thought everything went fine as they got to their hometown and saw her brother. But then when she clarifies the situation and announces me the bad news, it shocked me. Her big brother did not make it. I couldn't say anything, but sent her my condolences.

I pity Gigie. She and her family have been through rough times. Three years ago, her mum passed away. Last year, her other brother got married, then two months later, his wife, Gigie's sister-in-law, died, and so her brother was in depression. February this year, Gigie and her siblings that live here in Manila were requested to leave the place for some reason, and so they moved to a far place. Then, now it's her big brother.

Gigie has been a very good friend to me ever since we were freshmen back in 2001. She was there when I needed her. She is just one of my FEW friends who I feel the true kindness and concern for me all our college days, until now. Now, it seems she needs me, but then, I can't do anything. Not even nice words to make her feel good. I can't believe it, I can't prove to her that I am a good reliance. She needs me, but I'm too far. I don't know how I could comfort her.



- - - M A K E U P T O - - -

I would like to take this entry as an opportunity to make up to my friends who I feel I neglect this past few months or so. Forgive me, guys, if there were times that I was not there. I’m finding this hard to say, but you guys are in my heart. I will always care for you and love you. I want to tell you, I might not always there physically, but I am thinking of you. Hope you guys wont leave me.




I'm not the easiest person to love
I'm often the one who lets things go unresolved

Yet you choose to be on the side of me
On the side of me

I'm not too proud of some things
I've done in my life
The skeletons in my closet
Are too big for me to hide

Yet you choose to be
On the side of me
On the side of me
Blessed Charity
You're on the side of me

On the side of me
Everyone needs a friend to hold
When it's cold outside
And there's no place to go

Everyone needs a friend to hold
All alone I cried
There was no place to go
I remember when nobody cared
But you
I'm not the easiest person to love
But you, you've opened your heart to show me what I'm worth